When I went into labour with Indiana about eight-and-a-half years ago after a relaxed and robust pregnancy I did not for one minute think that I would not return home with a healthy baby. As I set off to the hospital - even though it was a month before my due date - I expected that very soon we would be making the calls to family and friends announcing our happy news. Turns out - and for this fact I am grateful beyond belief - I was right. When Indy was born 24 hours later Luke and I rang the expectant hordes to announce her sex and weight and that mum and bub were well. The usual stuff.

I am surprised that I was as blasé about the whole procedure as I was, given that my big sister, Lisa, had lost a full-term baby to stillbirth just a few years prior. Perhaps I figured that was enough bad luck for our family. Maybe I thought the chances of having a stillbirth or complications at birth were lower than they actually are. I think I was, quite simply, naive.

If you have read a little of this blog before you will know that one of the defining moments of my life was the stillbirth of my third child, Sienna, just three-and-a-half years ago. Because of foetal complications I knew Sienna would be stillborn as I drove with Luke to the hospital to deliver her. I cannot imagine what it was like for my family and friends waiting at home for our announcement of her sex (we didn't know beforehand) and her name and the fact that I had survived the labour.

After Sienna's birth I found myself a member of the 'babylost' community - parents from around the world who have lost babies through miscarriage, stillbirth and infant loss. (If you are up for it, this beautiful site will let you know a little about the community.) One thing this community shares along with the loss of our babies is the loss of our innocence. We know there isn't always a happy ending - as wrong and cruel as that may be.

And so it was on Friday - Red Nose Day, when my mind was particularly focused on babyloss - that I received an SMS letting me know that a dear friend, Amanda, was likely to go into labour (full-term) over the weekend. Amanda and I had shared a little of our journey together. Amanda started trying for a baby not long after I lost Sienna. In what seemed like a nice symmetry we both fell pregnant and were due around the same time. In a rather more tragic symmetry we both found out at our eight-week dating scans that our babies had no heartbeat. I suffered four miscarriages thereafter. Amanda went on to suffer the further devastating blow of miscarrying twins, so her pregnancy this time round has been a miraculous one - one on which so many dreams and hopes were pinned. When we all heard that Amanda was to be induced on Saturday we were beside ourselves with joy. My sister Lisa and I spent Saturday keeping up to date via SMS - as is the modern way. This is how it unfolded:

Lisa (Saturday 11.03am): Baby on its way will keep you posted
Me (Saturday 11:05am): Yay! Ntural labour?
Lisa (Saturday 11:07am): Induced
Me (Saturday 11:45 am): Cannot wait to hear. Wot do u thnk shes havng? I say boy
Lisa (Saturday 11:49 am): I say girl can't wait for the name.
Me (Saturday 12.17 pm): U thnk they hav changed from ruby n nash?
Lisa (Saturday 11:49 am): Rubi and jett last.
Me (Saturday 12:19 pm): Ah!

Lisa (Saturday 8:18 pm): Contractions still 10 mins apart. It's going to be a long night
Me (Saturday 8:19 pm): Bugger!
Lisa (Saturday 8:22pm): Lucky there is a Michael marathon on the wireless! She has had two lots of gel and still very slow. Poor thing!
Me (Saturday 8:25 pm): Poor girl!

Me (Sunday 9:39 am): No baby?
Lisa (Saturday 9:43 pm): No, I'm getting a bit worried. She will be exhausted by now. I can't bring myself to call again
Me (Sunday 9:53 am): I was 24 hrs with Indy don't forget. She will have a tale to tell.
Lisa (Saturday 9:54 pm): I really hope all 3 of them are sound asleep. I am just a bit freaked prob for nothing

(At this point Lisa and I had a long phone call where we reassured each other that everything was okay and suggested a variety of scenarios which might explain such a long wait.)

Me (Sunday 12:34 pm): Nothing yet?
Lisa (Sunday 12:42 pm): No AAARRRGGGHHH!!!!
Me (Sunday 12:43 pm): Agghhh!
Lisa (Sunday 6:09 pm): Just given her an epidural. Her and Adrian both having hard time, start praying for them. Hoping for news by 10pm
Me (Sunday 6:11 pm): Bloody hell, that sounds mental! I will pray for them. I will be up late so text me
Lisa (Sunday 6:15 pm): Poor Adrian. He really is having a hard time cos she is so sad. 1st baby they don't know what they are meant to be doing
Me (Sunday 6:15 pm): He is officially a dad! Never again to be carefree ☺

Me (Sunday 10:09 pm): Any news? Am going to bed soon
(Nothing further. I didn't sleep too well Sunday night.)

Me (Monday 6:44 am): I'm up. News?
Lisa (Monday 6:51 am): After a very long two days Ruby Jean arrived this morning at 4:03 am, weighing in at 7lb 8oz Mummy is exhausted, Daddy is very relieved and Ruby Jean is just beautiful. Have a great day!
Me (Monday 7:31 am): Omg! The best news! Can't wait to hear all about it

So while a happy ending doesn't happen for everyone, when it does it is truly miraculous to behold - and, for those of us who may have lost a little of our innocence, an absolute relief.

Congratulations Amanda and Adrian. Welcome baby Ruby!!

Do you have a story to tell about waiting for a baby to be born? Do you worry when friends or relatives are in labour?